Embarrassing myself once again

How was your day, Dan?:

Embarrassing myself once again

Here's a conversation I had recently, when I bumped into someone on the street. I'll only recount my side of what was said, you'll be able to figure out the rest. It's quite possibly the worst conversation ever.

--Hi.

--Um...have we met?

--Really?

--Really?

--I had sex with you?

--I had sex with you?

--Oh no, it's just that if I had sex with someone like you, I would hope I'd remember it.

--Wait, sorry, that came out totally wrong.

--Where were we?

--Really?

--And there too? How do I not remember this?

--Are you sure it was me?

--Okay.

--Well it's nice to meet you again.

--So, do you live here now?

--What do you do for a living?

--You're a doctor?

--You're a doctor?

--Were you a doctor back then?

--Oh, God.

--Where do you practice?

--You run the entire program?

--Wow.

--Me? Oh, I work for a computer company, I edit web pages for ___(insert name of very large client).

--Yeah, it's fun, although it's not exactly running the AIDS care unit for the entire county.

--Well, I...(...here I launch into long explanation of job, including technical details and terminology applicable only to the specific industry of the job. Very boring.)

--I should shut up, I can get diarrhea of the mouth. And I'm sure you don't need to deal with any more diarrhea, you probably see enough during the day as a doctor.

--Wait, did I just say that out loud? Because I'm hoping I was just thinking it.

--Oh really?...damn.

--Well thank you for laughing, but it wasn't funny.

--This is not going well. I'm so sorry.

--Yeah, well I say stupid things when I get nervous.

--Because I'm talking to a blond-haired blue-eyed doctor whom I had sex with, and I just told I didn't remember. Was I nice, at least?

--That's good. So what happened after?

--I didn't?

--Why not?

--Did I have your number?

--Oh. Hmm.

--Well...I should...I don't know...

--I do like it here, a lot. Although I don't really know anybody yet. (I said this on purpose, to get his number.)

--Oh, okay, cool, thanks. Hang on let me get my phone. (Ha HA! It worked.)

--What's your name again?

--I know.

--I know you just did.

--I'm sorry.

--Please tell me your name.

--Please.

--Pleeeease.

--Because (I close my eyes) your eyes aren't really blue, they're more a light grey, and your hair is blond with natural streaks, which is wet because you just came from the gym, but when it's dry it's probably a little wavier, and you have a freckle on your cheek right above the dimple you get when you smile, which I saw when you smiled at my joke that wasn't funny. I remember, except I'm just really bad with names, I'm sorry.

--Okay. What's your last name?

--Okay.

--I will.

--Promise.