So I Like Superman

So I Like Superman: "Bob's Yer Uncle

Jon is a hairstylist at the salon I used to work at. He's bitchy, sarcastic, and inappropriate; he looks and acts like someone stretched David Spade out, stuffed a dick in his mouth, and dressed him in Bang Bang's 1997 summer line.

That may sound harsh. The truth is, I actually like Jon quite a bit. But I also try to give as good as I get. Tonight, at View Bar's Woof party, he walked in, drunk and a little stoned, took one look at me with a slighty sweaty, blotchy brow (I am, after all, Whitey McNoPigment) and said, 'Hey, Rosacea! What's new, Pinky Tuscadero?' So fucking mean. But also super fucking funny.

Luckily, he also gets as good as he gives. Because then he told me a story about the previous week. He was at Splash (I know) with a bunch of friends, and started flirting with a guy on the dance floor. They bumped. They grinded (ground?) The man finally managed to coax Jon into taking off his shirt. He took one look at Jon's physique, grabbed the shirt, and handed it back to Jon.

So now Jon can call me Pinky Tuscadero any time he'd like."